“I’ve got to say, being told you’ve not been indicted for betraying your country is a pretty low bar for a victory lap,” Colbert cracked. “If I don’t run anyone over in my car tomorrow, I expect to celebrate with an ice cream cake.” One of Trump’s celebratory tweets even contained a rhyme about the “Russian collusion delusion.” That led Colbert to reply with a verse of his own:
Count Stephen Colbert as among the many stunned by the end of special counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election. Mueller reportedly found no evidence of collusion between Moscow and the campaign of President Donald Trump, which left the “Late Show” host with some burning questions. “If Trump is not working with the Russians, then what the hell is wrong with him?” he asked. “If they don’t have anything on him, why does he keep saying nice things about Vladimir Putin?” Colbert then went into a series of comparisons for the situation, ranging from “The Manchurian Candidate” to “Lost” to “Seinfeld.” As Colbert noted, many on the right are demanding apologies from those who have criticized Trump over the past two years. Colbert was happy to deliver...
The host of “The Late Show” noted how Carlson, who is actually a father of four, had previously ridiculously warned viewers that Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-N.Y.) was trying to stop reproduction of the human race with the proposed Green New Deal. “I think I speak for everyone when I say, ’Tucker, please don’t reproduce,” Colbert quipped during the introduction to a segment in which his team fired questions at Ocasio-Cortez. Carlson has been embroiled in scandal this month after the resurfacing of racist, sexist, misogynistic and homophobic comments that he made on shock-jock radio program “The Bubba the Love Sponge Show.”
There is growing speculation that special counsel Robert Mueller is winding up his investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election and allegations of collusion with the campaign of President Donald Trump. But “Late Show” host Stephen Colbert doesn’t want to wait any longer. He suggested an ending straight from the cartoons.
President Donald Trump announced that he donated his latest $100,000 salary installment to the Department of Homeland Security, then claimed he didn’t care if the media reported on it. But “Late Show” host Stephen Colbert said it doesn’t work that way. “That’s like naming a building The Anonymously Donated by the Great and Charitable Donald J. Trump Hospital,” he cracked on Tuesday. Trump also shared an image of the check, complete with his infamously illegible signature. That had Colbert wondering what that signature really says:
Stephen Colbert is taking on Jeanine Pirro, the Fox News host who was off the air on Saturday night after she was reprimanded by the network for an Islamophobic attack on Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-Minn.). That didn’t sit well with President Donald Trump. “Bring back @JudgeJeanine Pirro,” he demanded during a Sunday tweetstorm. Pirro’s absence came after she suggested on her show that Omar’s hijab might mean her beliefs are “antithetical to the Constitution.” But the “Late Show” host was ready with a reply: TONIGHT: Trump spent the weekend rage-tweeting about things he saw on TV. So, like, a pretty normal weekend. #LSSC pic.twitter.com/GM56RbqRGP — The Late Show (@colbertlateshow) March 19, 2019 Download
So, on Friday’s broadcast of “The Late Show,” he invited the fake First Lady (aka actress Laura Benanti) on to address the rumors. Benanti reprised her role as the bogus FLOTUS to staunchly deny the theories. “It makes no sense. How can there be two Melania Trumps?” she asked Colbert. “Think about it. Doesn’t it seem crazy that there is even one?” But when Colbert’s questions became too hot to handle, she stormed off — and then twice “returned” to give the comedian pause for thought. Check out the full comedy bit here:
But the “Late Show” host said Thursday that it had to “feel pretty good,” given their personal history. Three and a half years ago, Trump torched Paul for his physical appearance… and did so while insisting he wasn’t going to attack his looks. “Talk about the pot calling the kettle ‘plenty of subject matter,’” Colbert cracked:
Trump ranted about the “one-sided hatred” of the “unwatchable” shows Wednesday morning in response to a “Fox & Friends” discussion, which many people on Twitter noted the irony of. Kimmel said he and fellow late-nighters didn’t want to talk about Trump every night but that the president “gives us no choice.” “How about this, you stop being terrible and we’ll stop pointing it out, OK?” he advised. Meanwhile, Colbert proved on “The Late Show” why his comedy about the president definitely isn’t one-sided. Check out the “Jimmy Kimmel Live” clip here: And the “Late Show” clip here:
Stephen Colbert thinks he’s found it: the exact moment in which President Donald Trump believes his campaign promise was fulfilled and America finally became “great” again. On Wednesday morning, Trump tweeted: MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) March 13, 2019 Then, it seems to have happened. In an instant, America apparently became great again because as the “Late Show” host pointed out, Trump posted a second tweet just 27 seconds later: KEEP AMERICA GREAT! — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) March 13, 2019 “In between those two tweets was the exact moment when America became great,” Colbert cracked. “That’s just science. That’s just math.” What happened during those 27 seconds? Given that Trump cited “Fox & Friends” in another tweet just two minutes earl...
The company claims that a software issue is causing the plane to tilt downward and that it is going to issue a fix. But Colbert isn’t taking much comfort in that. The “Late Show” host even shared Wednesday what a pilot’s announcement in that situation might sound like:
“Sort of refreshing in a horrible way,” he cracked. But the report also led Colbert to admit that the assumptions people make about people who are wealthy and famous are in some cases absolutely true. “You know how conspiracy theorists say everything is rigged for the wealthy and famous?” he asked. “Well, as a wealthy, famous person, let me just respond by saying: ‘You’re absolutely right.’” See his full take on the situation below: